1. Rajnikanth can cut knife with apple.
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2. What does GOD exclaim when he is shocked? Oh my Rajnikanth!
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3. After 20 years, Robots will make a movie called Rajnikanth.
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4. When Rajnikanth logs on to Facebook.com, Facebook updates its status message.
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5. CAT is outdated. Now, the students have to prepare for RAT…wondering what it is?…Rajnikanth Aptitude Test.
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1. Rajni is so hot…the cigarette burns before it’s lit.
__________________________________________
2. Rajnikanth irons his shirts while he’s wearing them.
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3. Rajnikanth wrote a check without any bank balance and the bank bounced.
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4. Only Rajnikanth can smell what the rock is cooking.
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5. Intel’s new tag line…. RAJNIKANT INSIDE!
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1. Rajnikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013.
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2. Rajnikanth did, in fact, build Rome in a day.
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3. Rajnikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost.
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4. Rajnikanth can play the violin with a piano.
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5. Rajnikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
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1. Rajnikanth doesn’t breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.
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2. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajnikanth lives in Chennai.
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3. Rajnikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.
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4. Rajnikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.
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5. Rajnikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life.
___________________________________________

1. Rajnikanth doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajnikanth.
_________________________________
2. Water boils faster when Rajnikanth stares at it.
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3. Rajnikanth kills two stones with one bird.
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4. Google won’t find Rajnikanth because you don’t find Rajnikanth; Rajnikanth finds you.
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5. Rajnikanth leaves messages before the beep.
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1. Rajnikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.
_____________________________________
2. Rajnikanth can make PCs better than the Mac.
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3. Rajnikanth killed the Dead Sea.
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4. When Rajnikanth does push-ups, he isn’t lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.
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5. There is no such thing as evolution, it’s just a list of creatures that Rajnikanth allowed to live.
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1. Rajnikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are now called giraffes.
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2. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajnikanth kicked one of the corners off.
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3. Rajnikanth can build a snowman out of rain.
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4. Rajnikanth doesn’t need a visa to travel abroad. He just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates.
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5. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajnikanth, there is no other way.

1. Rajnikanth can divide something by zero.
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2. Rajnikanth can drown a fish.
________________________________
3. Rajnikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
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4. Rajnikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs.
________________________________
5. Rajnikanth can slam a revolving door.

1. Rajnikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
_____________________________
2. Rajnikanth can make onions cry.
_____________________________
3. Rajnikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
_____________________________
4. Rajnikanth can watch the show 60 minutes in 20 minutes.
_____________________________
5. Rajnikanth puts the ‘laughter’ in manslaughter.

1. Rajnikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated..

_____________________________________
2. Rajnikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2^nd; no one fools Rajnikanth.
_____________________________________
3. Rajnikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
_____________________________________
4. The last time Rajnikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated.
How? Resonance.
_____________________________________
5. Rajnikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.
_____________________________________

1. Rajnikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.
___________________________
2. Rajnikanth can speak Braille.
___________________________
3. Rajnikanth can dodge Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kicks.
___________________________
4. Rajnikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.
___________________________
5. Chuck Norris once met Rajnikanth. The result – He was reduced to a joke on the internet.

1. The square root of Rajnikanth is pain. Do not try to square Rajnikanth, the result is death.
_________________________________
2. Rajnikanth has a deep and abiding respect for human life unless it gets in his way.
_________________________________
3. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajnikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.
_________________________________
4. Rajnikanth laughs at you and your silly jokes about him even before you think them up.
So don’t bother.
_________________________________
5. Rajnikanth saved the gal with one hand…titanic with the other

1. Rajnikanth can write into A READ ONLY FILE.
_____________________________
2. Rajnikanth doesn’t have a Twitter account, because no one can follow him. He is already following everybody.
_____________________________
3. Bullets dodge Rajnikanth.
_____________________________
4. If you spell Rajnikanth wrong on Google it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Rajnikanth?” It simply replies, “Run while you still have the chance.”
_____________________________
5. Rajnikanth can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

1. Rajinikant can lick his elbows.
___________________________
2. Rajnikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
___________________________
3. Rajnikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost.
___________________________
4. Rajnikant doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
___________________________
5. Rajnikant got his drivers license at the age of 16 seconds.

_______________________________________
2. Once Dinosaurs borrowed money from Rajnikanth and refused to pay him back. That was the last time someone saw Dinosaurs.
_______________________________________
3. Rajnikanth can build a snowman…out of rain.
_______________________________________
4. When Rajnikanth enters a room, he doesn’t turn the lights on…. he turns the dark off.
_______________________________________
5. Rajnikant’s codes are never reviewed;
if he makes an error, that’s an invention.

It's amazing how girls can translate a guy's
'Hi' into a billion meanings while all he meant
was just 'Hi'

Gandhiji ke jeevan se prabhavit hokar maine unki photo jama karna shuru ki hai
Aap logo ke pass 10, 20, 50, 100, 500, 1000, ke
jitne NOTE hai dekar sanyog kare :P

Ek enGineer ki PUKAR...- Hey bhagwan uthale mujhe..
.
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.
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.
. exam ke baad vapas bhej dena...:D :P

That awkward moment when Bobby Deol's
wife calls him 'Bobby darling' :P :D

Loving someone who doesn't love you is like Batting when you need 37 runs in 6 balls.... You know it is impossible but you still have
little hope...
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.
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. that
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Nehra will bowl the last over

Santa looking at sky asks Banta : Is that a sun or moon? Banta replies :
Oye !
No idea!
Im new to this city.

Ek dost dusre dost se: Agar "Teri "Bivi se "Bhootni Lipat
Jaye,To Tu Kaya Kare ga?
.
.
.
.
.
Dusra dost: Mujhe "Kaya Karna!
Ye Do "Behno" Ka" Aapsi "Mamla" Hai.. :D

Q. Explain 2 tier and 3 -tier Architecture ?
A. Two wheelers like scooters will have 2 tyres and autorickshaws will
have 3 tyres.

Q. I want to store more than 10 objects in a remote server? Which
methodology will follow?
A. Send it through courier.

Q. Can I modify an object in CORBA?
A. As you wish , I do not have any objections.

Q. How do 2 threads communicate with each other ?
A. Sorry, Non living things can't communicate.

Q. Explain RMI Architecture?
A. I am a computer professional not an architect student.

Q. What is the use of Servlets ?
A. In hotels, they can replace servers.

Q. What is the difference between Process and Threads?
A. Threads are small ropes. Make a rope from threads is an example for process.

Q. What is JAR file ?
A. File that can be kept inside a jar.

Q. What is JINI?
A. A ghost which was Aladdin's friend.

Q. How will you call an Applet from a Java Script?
A. I will give invitation.

Q. What is bean ? Where it can be used ?
A. A kind of vegetable. In kitchens for cooking they can be used.

Q. Write down how will you create a binary Tree ?
A. When we sow a binary seed, a binary tree will grow.

roflmao :D :P

Arjuna: I can aim and shoot the tip of a rat’s tail.

Rajinikanth: I can hit the rat’s tail tip’s cell’s mitochondria protein’s
amino acid’s base pair’s hydrogen bond in the ratio of 1.23:5.32!

Arjun: Aap toh serious ho gaye!!

Rajnikant went to world cooking championship..
Of course rajni won
but guess what he made in finale???
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Lal mirchi ki meethi khir

Rajnikanth bought 4 elephants ,4 camels and 4 horses frm zoo along with a battalion of soldiers.
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.Y?
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.
Simple
To Play chess!!!!!!

The death of Micheal jackson is revealed
.
.
.
The day before he died
He saw Rajanikanths Dance
And he got shocked
.
.
.
Because rajani had performed “SUN WALK”

Once Rajnikanth was practicing for a spelling test… the rough sheet he used is known as…
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OXFORD DICTIONARY

USA POWER
vs
INDIAN POWER

USA-

10000 nuclear weapons, 600000 army, 10000 tanks,
12000 air force, 3000 ships

INDIA-
*RAJNIKANTH*

Rajnikanth in IPL
climax:
1 ball , 23 runs needed for Chennai to win.
..
Rajni batting…
Bowler bowls…
Rajni hits…
Ball into 4 pieces …
All go for a Six!!!!

Now all the C,C++ programs will execute even with Errors,
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.
Just include the header file, “#Include<Rajnikanth.h> “

If SUPERSTAR RAJNI would hve born 150 yr back.
.
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.Then
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Britishers would hve fought for INDEPENDENCE !!!

Yanna Rascala, MIND It!!p

* When Rajnikant dies..his tombstone will not read RIP...... ......... It will read.......BRB!!

* Ghosts have been debating for ages whether Rajinikanth really exists or not.
  But they are scared anyway.

* In Rajinikanth's wedding, the fire took the saath phere of Rajinikanth and his bride.

* Only Rajinikanth can kiss his own ass.

* Computer viruses are looking for Anti-Rajinikanth software.

* When Rajnikanth was a kid he made his mom eat her vegetables.

* The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Rajnikant out.
  They didn't know that Rajinikanth can walk through walls.

* Rajnikant can tie his shoes with his feet. Wink !

* In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Rajnikant.
  The ones listed are in second place."

* Rajnikant can make a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.

* Rajnikanth and Superman once had arm wrestled and the loser had to wear his
  underwear over his pants... We all know who won..!! It was even worse for Spiderman.
  He had to wear his underwear over his head.

* Rajnikant irons his Pants with those still on.

* Rajnikant can squeeze orange juice from a banana.

* Rajnikanth can write into a READ ONLY file.

* Rajnikant once wrote his autobiography. Today that book is known as
  "Guiness book of world records" and his childhood homework is now called Wikipedia.

What do you call Rajnikanth's Aunty ?? Rajini-Ki-Aunt !!!

* Rajnikant first takes the gold medal and then starts the race

* Rajnikanth went for morning walk...... In the afternoon police stopped him.. Because he
  reached USA without visa..!!!

* Rajni gave permission to Sachin to score those hundreds..

* Alfred Noble is nominated for RAJNIKANTH award !

* Rajnikant knows the exact value of Pi upto a Googol

* Rajnikanth laughs at you and your silly jokes about him even before you think them up.

* Some actor set benchmarks in cinema, Rajnikanth sets deskmarks

* Rajnikanth has a deep and abiding respect for human life unless it gets in his way.

* Whenever Rajnikant makes an error, it’s an invention.